(for j.w.3)
My friends
They tell me to have fun
In dating and getting to know people and when it becomes no longer fun to let it go

But see I have this difficulty in separating fun with the constant thought of the possibility of the future

Like, well this is fun
Can it be fun for a long time?
Can I hold onto it?
I hope so cause I like it a lot

And I was there
In that moment where it was fun to just kiss and tell
And smile
And act like I cared
But then he got hurt and called me crying
And I don’t want to be the one making tears fall
But I don’t wanna cry either

His name is unspoken
But he speaks to me often
When he wants to
And he likes it
And I like being thought of

I also like not having to do much else than breathe
But I know this is temporary
And I don’t like temporary arrangements

And I don’t like having to hold onto these pieces of what will eventually be the past in hopes that it will one day become a future
If it looks good why can’t I have it now?

Are we all in some hilarious game of limbo
Waiting for the pole to drop
Knock us out and then back into consciousness where we’ll finally be not trying to set up our lives anymore?

I want to have fun
I want to meet people
But then no I don’t
I want to meet some ONE
I don’t need more than one

But I think he, the one without name, is just into having fun
After all he’s only here for a while and he might as well live it up

At the end, perhaps he’ll say something wonderful and romantic like
These past few weeks/months have been wonderful
I’ll think of you always while I’m away
And every time I’m home we’ll be together

I don’t know
May not be good enough
This may not be the answer