Pouring oneself out is freeing and refreshing. Baring of course, but nudity has never felt better.

Today, just now, I wrote the absolute love of my life an email that pretty openly and explicitly declared him to be my one. In it I shared that I believe the vision I was given, with him in the loved position in my life forever, was true and accurate. And for one of the very first times I didn’t feel fear in saying what I would to him—via email, of course, but saying it nevertheless. Unlike some email systems, I do not have a retract key that I can press and undo what I’ve done.

What has been expressed in the words I just sent are now out and available to him.

This society in which I live: United States, New York, we live in constant fear. Fear of loss, fear of love. It’s all very puzzling and indeed quite annoying as well. Mostly because growing up conscious doesn’t stop the chance of falling prey to the oppressing systems, most of which rely on their ability to instill and sustain an attitude of fear in its inhabitants. Yet as I speak against fear, so am I a constant slave to her.

As I try to pry myself from her grip she tightens her fingers around my arm and neck and wills me to stay. And out of fear for, now for my very life, I remain both a victim and a slave and a rent-paying resident.

But just now…for just a brief moment—and these moments do sometimes come—I experienced the freedom of expression, via email to the man I love, my one. I didn’t try to open or shut or even to create any doors. I just laid down what treasures I had at his shore and perhaps my release from fear will do the same for him. I pray him well.